Eugene had done a thorough process of discernment – and had been told by his spiritual director that his priestly vocation was “as clear as the noonday sun.” Once he had understood this as God’s will, he never wavered in his conviction and finally finds the courage to write to his mother to tell her:
Darling mamma, before I shared with you the designs the Lord’s mercy has for me, I wanted to ask my uncle to broach the subject with you, to help you to see the thing in its true light and so as not to upset you unintentionally, as I know how tender your heart is. However many pains one may take to explain something in a letter, it is difficult to foresee every objection or even the different perceptions people have.
That is why I asked my uncle, a man worthy of appreciating God’s ways, to communicate to you the Master’s designs we are all bound to obey on pain of damnation, to answer any objections you might make, in short, through telling you my reasons, to get your approval for a project that certainly comes from God, as it has passed all the tests required of any inspiration that seems unusual, and it has been sanctioned by all the persons who hold his place in my regard…
He then gives the reasons he sees for becoming a priest, and we see here the kernel of what he lived for the rest of his life:
As the Lord is my witness, what he wants of me is that I renounce a world where it is almost impossible to find salvation, such is the power of apostasy there;
– that I devote myself especially to his service and
– try to reawaken the faith that is becoming extinct amongst the poor;
– in a word, that I make myself available to carry out any orders he may wish to give me for his glory and the salvation of souls he has redeemed by his precious blood
(First letter to his mother in which he speaks about his vocation to the priesthood
on June 29, 1808 in OW XIV n.27.)
Last night at Mass I had the opportunity to listen to Mike who is a friend of mine, give his reflection on Luke’s Gospel (16:19-31) about the rich man who died and was in hell. He spoke of the rich man who never noticed Lazarus on his doorstep in life and then not acknowledging Lazarus as a person even in death for he called out to Abraham to send his servant Lazarus with a touch of water. A way of looking at it that I had never thought of before but which I will never now be able to forget. I had to thank God for Mike and for the vocation that Mike (a married man with a good profession/career and who is a member of our parish) had received from God and which he was truly moving into just as Eugene did with his – seeing it develop and become full over time.
After Mass I went for coffee with another friend Larry, who spent his working life as teacher and who once he retired became incredibly involved in working with Development and Peace (because in his words he had so much when so many had so little) and who volunteers weekly at the Supper Table and who considers many who walk through those doors as his friends (vs clients or some ‘unnamed needy’ who he sees regularly for food). His life-long vocation of sharing first with students what he could that would help them to grow and then with others who had less than him (the most poor of the world and the most abandoned in the disguise of alcoholics, drug addicts, homeless, mentally ill and many who have fallen ‘through the cracks of life’). His vocation in life a little clearer to see somehow than Mike’s, but never-the-less both being most definitely vocations.
My vocation? I spend much time asking God to please be a little more clear about my vocation. Right after my conversion (what a catch-all word) I used to say that my vocation was to love. Now that’s really nice and clear and defined! But as I look back it holds true. In my professional career (which is how I defined myself for so long – in what I ‘did’) I had to learn to live and love others in way that I had not been taught about as a child. A slow and not always a peaceful and joyous process. But slowly over the years I grew into it, this way of letting go and so being able to share the incredible riches I was and am still being given. My vocation has not been noticeable by many for it is pretty ordinary at best but not so different from that of Mike or Larry or Eugene. It took discernment and prayer just as has theirs, as does theirs (for it doesn’t necessarily totally stop as time continues).
We all, like Eugene have had to discern, listen, pray and then live out who God has called each of us to be. For Eugene it was in his words to renounce the world and for me it is more within the world. But like Eugene I must devote myself to the service of my God, and hopefully help to ‘re-awaken’ the faith that is but hidden within the poor. Eugene said: “in a word, that I make myself available to carry out any orders he may wish to give me for his glory and the salvation of souls he has redeemed by his precious blood” – so beautifully said. I can only say that I wish to do whatever God will ask of me but always with the view of, in the shade of the Cross.
I am thinking of Eugene, who defined/described himself as the Father of his community, his congregation, founder of the Oblates of Mary Immaculate. His being and his spirit – who he was. I do the same when I announce who I am, Eleanor, an Oblate Associate, part of my vocation and how I will live it out. A project that certainly comes from God – I have but had to learn how to listen to the voices of God.
Ah Eugene, look at what your faithfulness to that call has brought about, sons and daughters of Eugene de Mazenod – did you ever imagine that you would be like Abraham, a father to nations?