BUT I DO IT SO THAT THE CAUSE OF HIS WRONGDOING WILL BE UNDERSTOOD AND TO RAISE THE HOPE THAT HE WON’T REPEAT THEM AGAIN

The message that Eugene and the Oblates always preached was that of God’s mercy and the possibility of a wrongdoer to convert and start again on a better path. Eugene lived this approach in his personal life too, and not only in the pulpit or confessional. Fr. Tempier had obviously complained about one of the servants in the house and wanted Eugene to fire him.

How can you ask me to intervene actively in a matter in which I would already derive intense suffering in a merely passive role. I have never voluntarily inflicted pain on anyone, even those who have done me the greatest injury, how could I cast someone into despair who is sincerely attached to me and has been manservant both to me and to my uncle?
Certainly he has caused me a lot of trouble, it has to be acknowledged, because of his very difficult character rather than from a sustained malice. I know that he has let everyone down in a very uncivil manner, as he has myself, and that is what hurts me most; but it is because of his character, it is a lack of formation and often through being over-attentive. I am saying this, not to excuse him: who is more critical than I am of his behaviour? Who feels more sharply the repercussions?
But I do it so that the cause of his wrongdoing will be understood and to raise the hope that he won’t repeat them again, for a month has passed now in which he has given satisfaction, I know that he’ll be unhappy to leave my household. How can I bring myself to plunge him into this unhappiness? To make someone who loves me unhappy, when I can’t bear the idea of those who mean nothing to me suffering! I can’t do it.

Letter to Henri Tempier, 9 October 1835, EO VIII n 548

The preacher of mercy put his preaching into practice in his personal life – can I apply these words to my life and relationships?

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1 Response to BUT I DO IT SO THAT THE CAUSE OF HIS WRONGDOING WILL BE UNDERSTOOD AND TO RAISE THE HOPE THAT HE WON’T REPEAT THEM AGAIN

  1. Eleanor Rabnett, Oblate Associate says:

    By his own words Eugene admits that he has struggled with the behaviour of his servant’s difficult nature. Rather than pretending otherwise, he looks through eyes of love and so refuses to ‘condemn’ the man and have him lose his job. Love and forgiveness – compassion.

    I look at myself in both lights – how I might act and behave towards others (even it be only one or two) and how I react (or respond as the case may be) when another’s behaviour hurts or affects me.

    With the latter understanding does not always come easily and though I might not overtly act-out against the person who challenges me or offends me in some way I need to ensure that I do not speak ill of the person; dragging his or her name through mud helps no one. And even some mental ‘plotting’ or creating of scenarios to silently feel better does no good for it serves only to eat away the soul.

    Looking with love, through the eyes of our crucified Saviour as Eugene is doing and suggesting to Tempier is the loving response. Eugene speaks of his servant’s lack of formation – that is how he looks at it; how the servant’s upbringing may have been missing some vital areas. I think for a moment of how spoke of many of the priests who remained after the French Revolution – as he wrote the Nota Bene, the Preface to the Constitutions and Rules.

    Practice what we preach! How often have we heard that? If when confronted by another who hurts me in (whatever manner) – if I am able to look at that person through eyes of love I might be able to recognize as Eugene did their own struggles and pain.

    Even in applying this to my own sometimes ‘muddled’ self! The immensity of love in action as it happens in the everyday of our lives. A light has been turned on this morning and I want to step into it as I begin my day.

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