Eugene, the pilgrim, describes another of his special experiences in Christian Rome.
We returned to the Mattei palace where Monsignor d’Isoard stays; we had a light lunch and quickly got back into the carriage to go in procession to Saint Peter’s, where a confraternity had arranged to gain the jubilee indulgence by making a stop for prayer at Saint Peter’s. The Monsignor Dean of the Rota, in his prelate’s garb, carried the crucifix, I was beside wearing my cassock and long coat. As we went along, we sang the litany of the saints and I felt a real pleasure in making the streets of the Christian world re-echo my voice, singing the praises of God.
When we arrived at Saint Peter’s we were presented for veneration by the faithful the famous relics of the Passion, such as the wood of the true cross, the holy lance, etc. I was deeply moved by the profound silence which reigned in that entire basilica during this ceremony. Everyone was kneeling in the most pious prayer.
Nevertheless, it was an immense crowd. I should remark in this regard, what I have noticed ever since I came to Rome, continually making the rounds of churches; that I have noticed always and everywhere there has been the greatest respect, and that the piety of the faithful, who are however all ordinary people, poor peasants, most of them in rags, always edifies me more and more.
Roman Diary, 18 December 1825, EO XVII
“The Christian does not think God will love us because we are good, but that God will make us good because He loves us.” ― C.S. Lewis
I wonder if I would have the honesty and courage to walk through the streets of any city singing praises to God? I would love to be able to say yes, for sure, but I must be honest and admit that most likely not. Perhaps with a group of others I know, but truthfully? If I were to come upon such a group, would I join them? I do love to sing praises to our God, it is something so very joyful and right, but on the street, in public? I suspect that I might stop and watch such a group, and smile at them. I wonder if I wouldn’t be filled with some type of suspicion as to who they really were, you know, some type of fanatical group, maybe a cult. And if I knew some of them, perhaps I might wave, and smile, but join in? There might be a moment or two when I recognized that I admired them for their courage. But then I suspect that I would realise I was too busy and did not have enough time to join them. I might actually look at my watch and then quickly turn away from them, all the while thanking God for the faith he gives me. Going about my business, telling myself that I was not the type of person for carrying banners and walking in parades. I might even secretly thank God for making my thus, for creating me a sophisticated person, above all of that type of thing. And I suspect there might even be a small sense of loss in me that I would not be able to look at.
O Eugene, with your voice echoing off of the buildings, I think that you would not always be too proud of me. And yet I remember how you loved some of your sons, a couple in particular who were not so strong and courageous as you (at least at first), you chided them gently, always with great love, as would a father, as does our God. “…God will make us good because He loves us.” Perhaps Lord, the next time. For now there is solace in knowing that I am forgiven my many weaknesses, that I am so incredibly loved. “For you created my inmost being … I praise you … your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” I greet this new day with immense hope and the joy of stepping out filled with your love.