{"id":56,"date":"2010-06-06T19:39:30","date_gmt":"2010-06-06T17:39:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.eugenedemazenod.net\/?p=56"},"modified":"2010-09-02T19:08:44","modified_gmt":"2010-09-02T17:08:44","slug":"my-god-double-triple-increase-my-strength-a-hundredfold-that-i-may-love-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.eugenedemazenod.net\/?p=56","title":{"rendered":"MY GOD, DOUBLE, TRIPLE, INCREASE MY STRENGTH A HUNDREDFOLD THAT I MAY LOVE YOU"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"color: #000000;\">Continuing his pre-ordination retreat, Eugene meditates on his sinfulness in vivid terms (<em>I have delivered myself over to the devil as his slave<\/em>), Eugene turns to the love of God which has overwhelmed him and which he wants to spend the rest of his life responding to. This is what his priesthood is all about.<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<h6><strong><span style=\"color: #000000;\">And so I am convinced that I have never really loved you. But whom did I love in your place? The devil. Yes, it is the devil who has been my god, it is to him I have prostituted my whole being! See then how I have fulfilled the end for which I was created: I have hated my Creator, or at least I have acted just as if I hated him, and I have delivered myself over to the devil as his slave. <\/span><\/strong><\/h6>\n<h6><strong><span style=\"color: #000000;\"> <\/span><\/strong><\/h6>\n<h6><strong><span style=\"color: #000000;\"> And it is a monster like this, O my God, that you wish to claim as your own and have admitted into your sanctuary, whom soon you will invest with your priesthood. <\/span><span style=\"color: #000000;\"> <\/span><\/strong><\/h6>\n<h6><strong><span style=\"color: #000000;\"> <\/span><\/strong><\/h6>\n<h6><strong><span style=\"color: #000000;\"> My God, what language is there to express what this infinite, incomprehensible goodness means to me? My head is prostrate in the dust, my lips press the earth, my soul is emptied, I can do no more. <\/span><span style=\"color: #000000;\"> <\/span><\/strong><\/h6>\n<h6><strong><span style=\"color: #000000;\"> <\/span><\/strong><\/h6>\n<h6><strong><span style=\"color: #000000;\"> My God, double, triple, increase my strength a hundredfold that I may love you, not merely as much as I can, that is nothing, but that I love you as much as did the saints, as much as your holy Mother loved and loves you. My God, that is not enough, and why I should I not love you as much as you love yourself? That cannot be, I know, but to desire it is not impossible, for I form it in all sincerity in my heart, with all my soul. Yes, my God, I would like to love you as much as you love yourself; this then is how I may undertake to make reparation for my past ingratitude.<\/span><\/strong><\/h6>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: right;\"><em><span style=\"color: #000000;\">Notes made during the retreat in preparation for priestly ordination<br \/>\n<\/span>1-21 <span style=\"color: #000000;\">December , O.W. XIV n. 95<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Continuing his pre-ordination retreat, Eugene meditates on his sinfulness in vivid terms (I have delivered myself over to the devil as his slave), Eugene turns to the love of God which has overwhelmed him and which he wants to spend &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.eugenedemazenod.net\/?p=56\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[40],"tags":[11,6,49],"class_list":["post-56","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-retreat-notes","tag-gods-love","tag-priesthood","tag-sin"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eugenedemazenod.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eugenedemazenod.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eugenedemazenod.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eugenedemazenod.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eugenedemazenod.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=56"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.eugenedemazenod.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eugenedemazenod.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=56"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eugenedemazenod.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=56"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eugenedemazenod.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=56"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}