My consistent thought has always been that our little family should consecrate itself to God and to the service of the Church through the vows of religion.
Rambert, I p. 187
The heart of Eugene’s conversion journey, the culmination of which is expressed in his « Good Friday experience » is contained in his commitment to live “only for God…”. His ordination and commitment to priesthood confirmed this direction of consecration: “I wish to live only for you…” (See above the entries of June 7, 2010 and August 27, 2010)
Now he wanted others to share in the richness of the consecration to “live only for God” that had been the source of meaning for him for the previous ten years. In 1813 he had already put this into practice with the members of his Youth Congregation. In the Oblate archives in Rome (APR DM VIII 3) we have a handwritten copy of the text of consecration of the youth that contains the signatures of hundreds of congregants from 1813 to 1822. It is a consecration to the Most Holy Trinity “through the hands of the Blessed and Immaculate Virgin Mary our mother and patroness.”
It is natural that Eugene wanted to share something that he treasured so much with the people who were the closest to him. For the Oblates he wanted this consecration to contain all the depth and commitment expressed through vows.
As it did yesterday, today’s posting, Eugene’s thoughts and writings speak so clearly to me – there are no questions about what he was trying to say – it is all there. “My consistent thought has always been that our little family should consecrate itself to God and to the service of the Church through the vows of religion.” What does this mean to me in how I live as an Oblate Associate? Eugene speaks of his little family, which has grown to become a very big family – even if I look at it from the idea of Oblates. If I look further to Mazenodian – I wonder if he had any idea in his lifetime of just how many he would share his spirit with? Again as so often before I find this speaking directly to me, a woman, a lay person. I take consolation in what the CC&RR says; “The charism of Saint Eugene de Mazenod is a gift of the Spirit to the Church, and it radiates throughout the world. Lay people recognize that they are called to share in the charism according to their state of life, and to live it in ways that vary according to milieu and cultures. They share in the charism in the spirit of communion and reciprocity amongst themselves and with the Oblates.”
So how do I make my oblation to God? How do I say – here I am Lord – take me, all that you have created me to be, all that I am and do with me what you will? How do I live that out? Will it be hidden and in silence or will I be able to proclaim it out loud? Do I stay out of a sense of call or stubbornness? Richard Rohr spoke about Jesus living through his fears and I would think that meant doubts as well. For me right now that seems to be all that I can do – stay and walk through them, the fears, the doubts, the questions. God have mercy on me.