Leflon tells us that Eugene “began looking for a way to establish his own living quarters. His first solution was one his mother had in mind: a profitable marriage which would enable him to live lavishly on the revenues of a very substantial dowry. In this, he was simply conforming to the noble traditions of the old aristocracy, which tried to dignify the essentially commercial character of this rather shoddy custom by falling back on the genteel language of heraldry: the coat of arms must be kept from tarnishing.
At this period of his life, our young hero had no other ideal than to trade his good looks and his nobility for glittering gold pieces. Less brutal than Mme. de Grignon, he did not talk of “fertilizing” his lands; nevertheless, his realistic admissions would shock anyone today who failed to recognize the interdependence of his mentality, surroundings, and times. He reduced the establishment of a home to what he called a “business transaction,” and even wrote it down as a “deal.” M. and Mme. de Mazenod took the same attitude, for their own marriage had been arranged in this manner and, despite their own sad experience, they still clung to this ruinous concept. With Eugene, as with them, the family fortune came first… Moral qualities, therefore, took second place, and did so as a matter of course, while riches were given the first and highest consideration. No mention whatever of love. (Leflon I, p. 257)
After this first setback, Eugene seems more and more disgusted with marriage. To his father who is exhorting him to become a good father and spouse, he gives a response which reveals his discomfort with the latter prospect:
It is not that I do not want to have a lot of little children, ma la moglie [ed. but the wife]! Ah! A wife is a terrible thing! And then again, there is the fact that I want her to be very rich, richissima e buona [ed very rich and good]. That combination is very hard to find.
You can see, then, my dear papa, that your wishes run the risk of remaining in the oven for a long time yet. In fact, if your wishes were able to create money I would go for that; we can do whatever we want with this devilish currency. I do not know if it is because they preach at me all day that we must be detached from worldly goods, but it is certain that for some time I feel an inordinate desire to possess lots of it. And this is the result on me of the sermons of the ladies. I could do such lovely things with money; you would never lack anything, my poor relatives. Ma, perfida sorte, tanto favore non mi accordasti. [ed. But, perfidious luck, you do not grant me your favors].
Letter to his father, 10 May 1804, Méjanes, Aix
These texts all point to the power of the conversion experience that was awaiting this lost young man when he was finally able to focus on the Source of true and lasting happiness
“He that is of the opinion money will do everything may well be suspected of doing everything for money.” Benjamin Franklin
There is a real sadness in seeing how Eugene struggles. I can understand his attitude towards women for it has been formed by his life, especially the one he is living at the time of this writing. He had found happiness in the riches of his life before returning to France and is sure that is the answer to his problems in France. He seems to be without any real presence and influence of a man in the house save for himself; he is only in his early twenties a typical young man wanting to live well; and he has been influenced greatly by the practices of his time and his mother and her family in bringing everything down to business practices.
It is certainly no different than what I see happening today in some ways, and it is most certainly no different than some of the coats of life that I have tried to put on and wear in my own life. Young Eugene’s heart seems to have run out of fuel and he is running only on fumes.
His life serves to highlight how greatly he was soon to be transformed by God. And I can so relate to this from my own life circumstances, different and yet the same. I have often referred to my heart as having been encased in stone, shriveled and unable to break free and grow. God found a way – with Eugene, with myself.
“And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.” (Ezekiel 36:26)